OUCH – Times Three
Seven years ago on October 29, Dean and I were blessed with two big life changes. The first was the birth of our sweet granddaughter, Caroline, and the second was spending the first night in the house we had worked all spring, summer, and fall to build. Dean acted as the general contractor and he and I did much of the finish work ourselves. It was a labor of love and we had an absolute blast doing it. We often talk with wonder and gratitude about how God picked us up from Hudsonville and transplanted us to the Allegan area. We left behind our small homestead of 23 years, my business, and a church in which we were highly invested. In hindsight, we can see many reasons why, how, and where God chose to move us; the most important of which was bringing us to Corner Bible Church.
One of the first things we became involved with at Corner, was Bible Study at Nick and Mary Westra’s home on Monday nights. The men were studying the book of Revelation and the ladies were studying the scriptural “One Anothers”. I began with the group mid-stream of the study, so I missed some important sections, but what I learned was revolutionary to me. As Pastor Davis mentioned during his sermon, SENT, 59 New Testament references give instruction for relating to our brothers and sisters in Christ. I think many have gone through this study at Corner and I can see the fruit in how they interact with others. I would like to share a few of these that have been the most influential to my thinking.
The first One Another that impacted me is found within Gal. 5:15-26. Verse 15 reads: “But if you bite and devour one another, watch out that you are not consumed by one another.” Paul then goes on to describe how living by the Spirit will keep us from walking by the flesh. Then vs 26 reads: “let us not become conceited, provoking one another, envying one another.” As I did some self-reflection, I saw how my pride influenced my attitude towards people who rubbed me the wrong way. Ouch.
The second is found in Ephesians 4:1-3 “I therefore, a prisoner for the Lord, urge you to walk in a manner worthy of the calling to which you have been called, with all humility and gentleness, with patience, bearing with one another in love, eager to maintain the unity of the ‘spirit in the bond of peace.” To bear with one another in love means to be patient with others when they sin against me as the Lord teaches them. It has the implication of enduring with them by not overlooking the sin, but by delaying consequences and being merciful. It requires self-restraint and patience which is a major challenge to our flesh. Here’s another Ouch.
The third is found in Philippians 2:3-8 “Do nothing from selfish ambition or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves. Let each of you look not only to his own interest, but also to the interests of others. Have this mind among yourselves, which is yours in Christ Jesus, who, though He was in the form of God, did not count equality with God a thing to be grasped, but emptied Himself, by taking the form of a servant, being born in the likeness of men. In the study of this particular passage, I learned about the upside-down way we understand living by the Spirit because of our flesh lens. Humility is the avenue to glory, not the other way around, and going through difficulties is a tool God often uses to humble us. He is after soft-hearted submission to His leading during our relational interactions, which, if we are obedient, should be full of meekness. And here’s the third Ouch.
Dean and I experienced some rough times at our old church, many characterized by hurtful displays of unmitigated flesh. (Who hasn’t had this happen at one time or another?) Studying the One Anothers helped me understand how I contributed to some of the issues by responding in a self-preserving, defensive way. I allowed my flesh to rule my behavior instead of the Holy Spirit’s empowerment. After an ugly split that occurred over 20 years ago, the church continued to wane in numbers, and I have to attribute the lack of growth partly to us allowing our flesh to rule. Dean and I concluded that God didn’t allow growth because we couldn’t properly care for the new people He would bring to us. How we follow the leading of the Holy Spirit in our relationships impacts our ability to bring the Good News of the Gospel to those who desperately need it. It’s the foundation of evangelism. I can’t be a witness of the Good News if I don’t live it first in the practice arena of my relationships with people already part of the Body of Christ. Davis’s message, along with revisiting these Scriptures has challenged me again as I can see areas I still need work, and my prayer is for more growth!